I have to be proud of me ...

I have to be proud of me because it means more coming from ME than it does from anyone else.
Not to mention, not very many even recognize how far I have actually come.

I began this journey of health and training my brain on April 3rd.  My original goal was to lose 80 lbs at a rate of 1 to 2 pounds per week. 

On September 9th for the first time, someone who doesn't know that I am in training told me that it looked like I may have lost a little weight.  

April 3rd to September 9th!!!  That is over FIVE months folks!  5 MONTHS!!  And for the first time I get the 'have you lost a little weight' question!!  Mind you, this is after 39 pounds...and it looks like I have lost a 'little' weight.

That was a victory and I'll take it.

The day before (a single day before) someone told me that my body still looked the same, but it looked like I had lost some weight in my face.  In my FACE!!!??? 

Well...here it is.  I have lost in both my face and my body.  39 pounds is only one pound away from being half-way-there.  Half way is a nicer place to live, but I won't be here long, I fully intend to win this battle with my body and my brain.  This will be a downhill ride soon - I just need to creep over the precipice.  Today I feel like 39 is still on the uphill side of the mountain.  But in the back of my mind, I am thinking that every coming pound to lose will be on the uphill side as well.  That is ok, I am not quitting.  I am keeping this in motion and I WILL scoot over the top.

And by the way, I really should be proud of me.  I went from size 16 pant (snug by the way) and a 2X shirt size - - - to my current size 12 (loose) and XL size shirt.  I have two FULL garbage bags of clothes in my car ready to go to the donation center.  I am getting them out of my closet and purging the loose comfy clothes that hide my curves.  Right now, my closet is down to a bare minimum, but I refuse to keep clothes that are too big.  I REFUSE to return to that me that wore that size.

41 pounds left to go.  It may take another five months, and that has got to be alright.  I am going to do this in the most healthy way that I can.  But I have to say, that my brain is responding very well to this new training and my body is following.

side-note: yesterday was a turn-around day for me.  I realized that I have to have more faith - not just lip service but actual faith.  So I do.  And today I feel that relief.  It was like an instant fix.  I highly recommend it to everyone.  Best way to kick-start whatever you have going on.  It works.  Faith is the KEY!!